Friday, April 05, 2002

 

I just got off the phone with Elisa’s dad…. Grrr. Chad kept telling me to hang up, but I couldn’t, for several reasons, one of which was that Mr. Floyd was upsetting me, and I thought maybe if I stayed on the phone long enough, we would redeem himself… but he didn’t. Ok… here’s what happened. E called and asked for Elisa. She wasn’t here, and he said that that was okay, he really wanted to talk to me anyway. He asked if I was busy, and I said I was in the middle of something, but before I finished saying that, he was already talking again. So he asks me if I know what’s up between Ian and Elisa, (i.e. is he ever going to buy her a ring?). I said no, it was really none of my business, and I was under the impression that the whole subject was taboo at the moment. Then he tells me that I need to go tell Ian to “step up to bat.” (This from the same man who reamed Esa for putting ideas of marriage into Ian’s head). Then he starts in on Elisa’s summer plans.

Background info: Elisa just found out she has to stay for summer school, and was pretty upset about it because she has no money, and no place to stay over the summer. She was complaining to her study partners, and William offered to let he live at her house for free, as long as she cleaned for him. Elisa thought it was a nice gesture, and William is a really nice person, so she brought it up when she talked to her dad yesterday. Apparently he went ape, and said a bunch of stuff to her about how it was wrong to live in the same house with another guy, yada yada yada…. And her mother called her last night, and said the same thing….

So her dad starts in on me… telling me how probably only 1 in 100 guys in the engineering department are virgins (right). And how, once a guy has had sex, if he sees a pretty girl and is tempted, he can’t help but do it again. And how guys will do anything for sex… especially if they are drunk. He told me that if Elisa lived with William, William would get drunk and sleep with her “whether she was willing or not.” And that Elisa couldn’t live with that sin on her conscience forever. Excuse me? When did being raped become a sin? Last I checked, it wasn’t. As a matter of fact, the Old Testament says that if a man and a woman are found together, and they are far enough away that no one could have heard her scream, the woman is given the benefit of the doubt and let go, and only the man is punished.

And when did guys become sex crazed machines? Given, I know a few that have absolutely no willpower, but for the most part, the guys I know are decent enough to make sure the girl is on the same frequency they are. I know that there are some real assholes out there that don’t care… I could name one or two. But dadgum it, guys are not mindless animals!

Then Elisa’s dad says that if anything ever happened to Elisa, she would never be able to have a fulfilling marriage relationship. So now, not only do you go to hell if you have been raped, but you can’t hold a meaningful relationship? What the fuck? If someone truly loves you, they’ll understand… it may hurt… but they’ll help you through it. That’s what love is… Love isn’t about finding someone perfect… or making someone perfect… or overlooking their faults. It’s about loving them with their faults… and working through things together.

Obviously, Mr. Floyd is clueless. He wants me to tactfully drop hints to Elisa that sex is bad (which she rants about constantly), and hit Ian over the head with a sledgehammer (which Elisa has told me not to ever do)… all while condemning me and my future marriage to the darkest pit of hell.

I find it extremely difficult to do favors for people who tell me I’m going to hell.

posted by Deedee 8:26 PM