I think my problem is that the people I complain about the most don't read my blog. Which is why, probably, I complain about them here.
So I got told at least a dozen times today that I've gained some weight, and I need to watch what I eat blah blah blah.
Look. People. I. am. Perfectly. Happy. The. Way. I. Am. Get the hell over it.
I mean really... am I that huge and gross? Am I in danger of having weight related health problems? Am I seriously fat or something? Am I looking at myself and missing what everyone else is seeing? What's wrong with me the way I am?
What's wrong with them? Why can't they leave me alone?
posted by Deedee 7:29 PM
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Thursday, May 29, 2003
ok... Let me explain to y'all what I know, so people will stop telling me things I already know in an effort to enlighten me.
I know I'm a doormat. I know people walk on me. I realize this... and I am, believe it or not, getting better about standing up for myself. It's not something that comes naturally to me, but I'm working on it. If I did not know that people walk on me, I would end up doing a lot more stuff for people than I do... I do not need to be told that people walk on me... if I complain to you about something, usually what I want is someone to say "Oh. That sucks." I do not want a lecture on how I let people walk on me... I do not need to be told all the things I do wrong to get in these situations... I do not need to be told to take an assertiveness class. I just want someone to listen.
I know I've gained weight. I'm not especially happy about this, nor am I especially worried about it. When I sense that it is becomeing a problem, and when I have the time and energy, I'll deal with it. End of story. If you are more overweight than I am, don't tell me what I should and shouldn't eat.
I know I'm in a bad mood... I'm working on that, too. I think that about 8-10 weeks of good solid sleep will cure me of that. Meanwhile, I'm sorry if I step on your toes. I'm dealling with a little more than I can handle at the moment, between my personal stress and interesting family dynamics... I don't have time to deal with your hurt feelings. I'll feel really bad about it later... But don't tell me I'm in a bad mood. I know I am. You'll only make it worse.
I'm sure there are other things I know that I could put here... but those are the ones that are bugging me the most tonight.
posted by Deedee 8:37 PM
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So David just pointed out to me that another blogger linked to my blog... which was cool, because they thought I was cool (actaully, they thought that David was cool for thinking that something I thought was cool was cool, and creating appropriate links)... It was the Penny Arcade Matrix comic, of all things. Hm. Interesting... You really should check the blog out though, it seems to be pretty cool (not that I've read any of it or anything. I'm at work, I have better things to do, right?)
I got another autograph... I got another autograph... This time from John Houbolt, who "championed the Lunar Orbit Rendezvous concept used to first land men on the Moon and return them safely to Earth." Yay for me! I have lots of cool stuff to hang on my walls when I get back to Starkvegas *grin*
posted by Deedee 9:46 AM
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Oh yeah..... It's Thursday (really? Already?)... so there are two new NASAexplores stories... Orbital Space Plane—Commuting To Space, which is a look at NASA plans for another orbit vehicle... and A Matter Of Taste, which is about how things taste differnt in space.
On Yesterday ok. Sorry if I pissed anyone off yesterday.... I was dealing with some interesting personal stress, most of which doesn't need to be blogged about (at least not here). So yeah. Sorry if I stepped on your toes. Little things were really getting to me yesterday. There... we can all play nice now.
On Yardsales Why the crap would anyone want to run a yard sale from 0800-1700 on a friday? The only people who yardsale on Friday (generally, people, generally) are mom's who don't work, and old people. Mom's who don't work usually have to put their kids down for naps at like, 1400 or so.... and old people don't yard sale until 1700... really... I have never never been yardsaleing after 1400.
On Family I love my family... but they drive me nuts. Like, if i say "I can take off half of Friday and help you do Thing X" and they say "Oh, that's great" and then you end up staying all of Friday, and either coming into work at like, 1730 and working for 4 hours (which would really stink), or just losing the 4 hours.... (It's actually physically possible for me to make up the hours today, but I would have to work like, 17 hours. so, like, 0530-2230... definately not cool... I would fall asleep at my computer)
On Sleep I think sleeping and eating are both bad habits. I think I'm going to give them up for Lent next year.
On Eileen Collins She was much smaller than I had imagined her to be... and very nice to talk to. I had several other interesting observations yesterday.. but it's like, 6am, and I have forgotten them for the moment. I might come back to that.... for the time being, you can go and see the NASAecplores team with Eileen Collins on David's blog... when I'm not so lazy (and my sister will let me on the computer) I'll post a copy here...
posted by Deedee 5:04 AM
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wow.... this early astronaut helped develop Disney's EPCOT... how awesome is that?
posted by Deedee 11:17 AM
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I stand corrected. It isn't a giant killer asteriod. It's Planet X. And the poles won't flip flop... they will shift by 90 degrees or so. Last night. All because the Earth has been slowing down, and has, in fact, by now, stopped spinning entirely (sunrise this morning is explained, I assume, by the fact that the Sun orbits the Earth). Check out the write up here (A link taken from David's blog... and i would like to point out that he didn't have all his facts straight either. So it's not all my fault)
hey... I'm going to be out of pocket like, most of the day at meetings and stuff. From 1030-1130, I will be totally unreachable, so if you need me, you can call my cell and I'll call you back (I won't have it with me), or leave a message on my work phone (256) 544-6748.
I'll prolly be hard to reach (but not impossible) from 1330 to like, 1530 or so... try my cell, or leave a message.
The world did not end... Amazing. No flip flop of the poles... no giant killer asteriod... Chad did manage to fix his computer, which was p[retty amazing considering the amount of smoke that was reported to have esaped the back of it.... but other than that, the world is as it was... So sad.
So, in celebration of the world not ending... I refuse to let today suck. Numbers on the calendar will no longer mean anything, and the fact that I'm clocking 12 hours today, and I haven't slept much, and I have a million things to do tonight will all be overridden by the fact that I get to see an astronaut today. Not just any astronaut, either. Eileen Collins. w00t! And the fact that for the second day in a row, i got to watch the sunrise over Rocket Park (wait... is that a good thing? I guess it is now...)
Yeah. That's my goal for today. And to finish the Portal glossary... at least the NE part of it.
posted by Deedee 4:58 AM
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Tuesday, May 27, 2003
Guess what!! My whole team here at NASAexplores is going to go see Eileen Collins tomorrow *grin* Which is like, the coolest thing ever... we have 15 minutes of her time, and in that time David's going to interview her for one of our summer features... and we're all going to act like the astronaut groupies we are and get her to sign lithos for us. Oh yeah. Y'all should be *so* jealous. :-)
In other news, I heard a startling rumor that the world is going to end today... something about a killer asteriod zooming close enough to the Earth to cause the magnetic pole to flip flop.... Amazing, no?
posted by Deedee 1:48 PM
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Dude... I just looked down at the clock and was like "Man... it's ony 1000... feels like I've been here for 4 or 5 hours...." The I realized... It is only 1000, and yet, I have been here for 4 1/2 hours.
It's going to be a long day... we're hoping to leave at 1630 or so, but not sure when parents will get around to driving out here. *sigh* I wish I could make my car work.
posted by Deedee 8:55 AM
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Oh yeah... just a side note... Should you be in Memphis, and looking for something interesting to do.... Stop by Chad's house. I hear rumor that He has somewhat of a menagerie over there... something about geese... and an elephant. *grin*
posted by Deedee 6:39 AM
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Monday, May 26, 2003
So... when you stop reading a comic, for say, like, maybe, 2 months or so, you miss things... and get hints at them later (excuse the language... it's Penny Arcade, what do you expect?)... and then you always wonder.
I want to move to a town where no one knows me, and no one has ideas as to who I should be based on who I was in Jr. High, or who my parents are, or didn't like me in High School. Then peopel would have to figure out who I really am... without trying to stuff me in a box I don't fit into. And without questioning my actions/reactions based on who and what they think I should be.
If computers still can't figure out that those penis enlargement e-mails in their inboxes are spam, how can they possibly assess the merits of a book report on The Sun Also Rises?
~The Write-Stuff Software
So... I spent all day Friday in bed... All day yesterday fixing the obvious problems with my bug (only to reveal more, less obvious problems)... and today I intend to spend all day again working on the Bug.... so I get up this morning, and my sister's gone to church, and everyone else is asleep.... so do I take advantage of this time to get some housework done? Or to work on my car without interruption? Nope. I sat at my sister's computer and caught up on Strong Bad e-mails. I am such a bad person.
So now I'm waiting for my brother to get himself out of bed, so I can make him play gopher while I work on my car... Sometime today, I need to update the Wesley site.... And there's still the housework... But Chrissy decided not to rent the trailer... so there's no deadline on moving anymore... which is really nice. Yay for less stress in Deedee's life!
I may, actually, only spend three or four hours working on the Bug... when I'm too tired to play auto mechanic, I'l come in and shower, and play webmistress for a while... then maybe I'll get some housework done... or maybe take a nap. We'll see.
posted by Deedee 9:46 AM
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Thursday, May 22, 2003
Quote from an article online:
Cabrol also said that currently prolonged space travel isn't the best thing for a person's system because of gravity. Such a trip would take at least half a year. It's feasible, but the astronaut would have to recover from the trip once they landed. Luckily, there appears to be some gravity on Mars.
"appears to be some gravity"? Silly me... I thought we had had probes or something land on Mars... I thought we *knew* whether there was gravity there or not, not made some wild guesses based on what *appears* to be true. But you know... I might be wrong.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
~ Mahatma Gandhi (1869 - 1948)
The hatred you're carrying is a live coal in your heart - far more damaging to yourself than to them.
~ Lawana Blackwell, The Dowry of Miss Lydia Clark, 1999
Holding on to bitterness is like taking poison, hoping the other person will die.
~ Anonymous
Anger makes you smaller, while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you were.
~ Cherie Carter-Scott, "If Love Is a Game, These Are the Rules"posted by Deedee 10:01 AM
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w00t! Today is publish day at NASAexplores (Why? Because every Thursday is ... ... publish day at NASAexplores *grin*)..... so check out our two new articles: Safe Landing, which is about parachutes, and Something To Get Excited About, which is about reflexes.
I have discovered that almost anythig sounds cooler when you add the words "as only NASA can" to the end of it... I think I shall work this phrase into everyday conversation more often, thus increasing my cool factor... Yeah.
So I just got e-mailed this question... How much does space suck? (as in, how much pressure does the vacuume of space have?)... So I respon with an explaination, and some links... but not the explaination I wanted to give *sigh*
So this is what I said:
An absolute vacuum is defined as 0 psi, or absolutely no pressure at all. Most vacuums are not exactly 0 psi, but very close. Some objects expand in a vacuum because there is not enough pressure to hold the object together, not because of "negative" pressure. Thus the power, or strength, of a vacuum is determined by how close it is to 0 psi.
When working with small pressure values, scientists usually use the unit torr, which is equal to 0.019 337 psi (1 mmHg). When testing spacecraft for the vacuum of space, NASA uses vacuum chambers that can reach pressures as low as 1 / 10,000,000 torr. So the pressure in space is, for the most part, negligible.
And this is what I wanted to add:
So, in essense, space does not suck at all, but neither does it blow.
Two. More. Hours. Mom just called to say she's going to pick me up at 1800, not 1600... which means I have two more hours to work today before i can go home and work some more. I dunno.... I may have to clock out early and play insaniquarium or something.... I dunno. If i do calendar stuff for two more hours, my head will explode.
And since I'll have to take Mom to work on the way home, I won't get home until around 1900... which leaves me what, two hours of daylight, max? I gues daylight isn't an issue today, the ground is too wet to work on the Bug... but still... not much work at home time left by the time I get there.
Somethings going to have to give... There's no physical way I can do everything that needs to be done. People are going to have to deal.... and help pull up the slack.
posative note of the day: It's raining. yay for rain!
posted by Deedee 10:56 AM
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Dadgum I hate Mondays. Especially when you have more than one a week... I'm 2 for 2 this week.
So... I didn't sleep last night. Like, at all. Like, I woke up 8 times in 6 hours. And I was dog tired to begin with from hauling books from the trailer all afternoon... So today has proceeded to be really really long, because I'm so dadgum tired.
And, not that this means anything to you, but Art Stevenson resigned... and I haven't got the whole story on that yet, but it seems to be a sudden thing... and I hate change.
So yeah. Deedee is not having the best of days.
But, on the other hand, I have gotten some work done. Check out the NASAexplores Calendar.... I'm working on getting it up to date with space facts and the like... e-mial me if you find typos... I'm sure there are some.
posted by Deedee 10:39 AM
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Monday, May 19, 2003
November 1918 - As World War I nears its end, Orville Wright notes to a friend that, "The Aeroplane has made war so terrible that I do not believe any country will again care to start a war."
~ AIAA History of Flightposted by Deedee 1:24 PM
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So things seldom ever happen exactly as you plan them....
Chad and I left Thursday night to go to Starkville, instead of waiting until morning... which was cool, because it gave us some extra time to do stuff on Friday. The Lunar eclipse was awesome (as veiwed from Red Bay, AL, and parts of Mississippi 23). We had a great time in Starkville, and looked at houses, and got to spend time with people at State... Chad even came to Aldersgate with me Sunday morning ;-)
so coming back to work today was hard *sigh* I had such a nice weekend off.... But I made it.... just in time for breakfast. *grin* And then I ran off to a meeting in the Discovery lab, which was very productive, but managed to take up the rest of the morning. And I've been working on calendar/trivia stuff since then. Today is a good day. So far, at least.... There's hope for the rest of the afternoon, too.
posted by Deedee 1:00 PM
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Thursday, May 15, 2003
Yay!! Chad is going to come and see me tonight!!
Right now he's watching the Matrix, then he's going to drive to Huntsville, and be here (hopefully) before the eclipse.... and spend the night here, and we'll go to Starkville tomorrow. *happy dance* I get to see my Chad... I get to see my Chad...
*sigh* But not for like, 6 or 8 more hours. So, back to work.
posted by Deedee 1:32 PM
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Some taste trivia I ran across while researching a lesson....
Scientists have measured the taste bud density of volunteers. They found that a person who is an "average taster" has about 184 taste buds per square centimeter of tongue - now that's a lot of tasting - but some people are "supertasters" with 425 buds per sq.cm. whereas those called "non-tasters" average just 96 buds per sq.cm.
The complete inability to taste is called ageusia and the reduced ability to taste is called hypogeusia. Ageusia is a rare disorder. It may be rare because there are 3 different nerves that carry taste information to the brain. Older people have a reduced sense of taste. This probably occurs because the taste buds are not replaced as fast in older people.
And a shameless plug for the NASAexplores site... we put up two new articles today (because it's Thursday, and we always publish on Thursday...). Catch A Microwave, and Muscle-bound Research. Check them out if you get a chance... The articles are really interesting.
posted by Deedee 9:52 AM
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Wow... I have a real assignment... like, researching lessons and stuff. Awesome!! No 508 for me *yay*
posted by Deedee 9:51 AM
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Yay! The weather channel says it should be clear between 2100 and 2330 or so tonight... just in time for me to see the eclipse!!
Today is link day, I suppose... because I can actually do that while I'm working on real stuff, and i might get assigned some real stuff to do today. If I don't have a real assignment in the next, like, hour or so, I'm going to make myself work on the 508 inventory that Karen made me start... to give you an idea of how tedious this thing is, I started on it summer before last... and I'm a third of the way through the first year of publication... but the site is now halfway through it's thrid year of publication... and i have to go back and change all the links that's I've already done, as rev2 changed all the urls. *sigh*
And I htink I'm going to post things one at a time to avoid confusion when commenting back to stuff *grin*
Headed home now after another exciting day at NASA... I actually accomplished stuff today, too... I redesigned some really spiffy PawPoint slides, and pulled together some more astronaut links and stuff.... so it's all good. Tomorrow is my last day this week.... and then I'll be back Monday. Yeah. So don't expect too much bloggage this weekend... I know I'll be close to internet access at some point during the weekend, to help Mat pick classes... but otehr than that, I'm not 'netting at all this weekend. Just enjoying being in Starkville with Chad *grin*
posted by Deedee 2:04 PM
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I hate calling people I don't know. *sigh* but that's life.
So it's Wednesday... and I'm at work. And I'm tired. And I hafta go to church tonight. Because Daddy's sick and can't take the little kids. Maybe I can find a quiet corner of one of the room to curl up and take a nap.... or not... naps might be dangerous. Maybe I can read. Reading is restful.
I feel guilty... because it's raining, and I'm enjoying the rain. And parts of Huntsville are still under water... so the last thing we need is more rain... but I like rain... When it rains, everything is ok. (unless your house is under 2 feet of water, I guess)... *sigh* I'm such an awful person... rejoicing in somehting that causes other people so much trouble...
Oh hey, random space excitement for the week: Be sure the catch the lunar ecplise Thursday night... it should be really visible anytime between 22:14 and 23:07, CDT. At least it should be, if it clears up around here.
Interesting note related to Daddy... My dad may soon become a pothead... or... well... something like it. Several people have suggested to him that medical marijuana might help him when he doing chemo. It's supposed to help a lot with the nausea and the pain... so he's going to ask Dr. Dang about it. What was recommended was the pills, mostly... although someone mentioned marijuana tea. Just an interesting note.
Too funny to not post here... think it'll work for me?
BTW, I blog spasticly at work... I keep a notepad window open, and type whatever comes to mind inbetween like, actually working and stuff. And then i post it all whenever I get a chance... so my post may be a little random. Just a little.
Hey hey hey.... send your name to a comet! How cool is that? Now my name will be on Mars, and on a comet! (I sent my name to Mars last summer). You get a spiffed out certificate, too...
Ah... finally. A "real" assignment. I get to design PawPoint slides for a big NASAexplores presentation. *sigh* The life of an intern is so demanding. *grin*
So i was reading in the astronaut factbook today.... and I came across this entry under "Deceased U.S. Astronauts" (among all the astroanuts who died in plane crashes, etc):
HENIZE, Karl G., Civilian
Born October 17, 1926, in Cincinnati, Ohio.
Bachelor of Arts in mathematics from the University of Virginia; Master of Arts in astronomy from the University of Virginia; Doctor of Philosophy in astronomy from the University of Michigan.
Flew on STS 51-F.
Cumulative hours of space flight are more than 190.
Died October 5, 1993, of respiratory and heart failure during a climb of Mount Everest.
So tell me... who else but a former astronaut would be climbing Mount Everest 12 days before their 67th birthday?
*BTW, Harrison Schmitt was a Doctor of Philosophy in geology from Harvard University.*
I should be like, all offended and stuff. But this guy's statements just prove my point (which had nothing to do with race). I was pointing out that he was making a stupid statement about someone, picking at a fault in them that he himself was exhibiting.
And that makes me racist.
I would like to point out, dear friends, that I have never met this guy, nor had I any indication of his racial or ethnic orientation.
And i would also like to point out that it is people like said individual that allow, and in fact encourage, other people to make stereotypes.
And having said all I care to say on that matter, I will go back to work.
posted by Deedee 9:44 AM
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ok... I give up. I obviously was never meant to sleep. Ever. Again. Because last night, I actually intended at sleep... I intended to go home, do some work on the house, and go to bed. Early. But no... on the way home, Elisa called me... I had forgotten her birthday (doh!) and she wanted me to come over and hang out and go bowling... I told her I was tired and I had no transportation... and she decided to come and get me and bring me to her house. So I went out and went bowling with Esa and company... and I didn't get home until after 11... and i didn't get to bed until like, 12. So I technically had 4 1/2 hours in which to sleep... but did I sleep for 4 1/2 hours? no. That would have made too much sense. I spent 5 hours in bed... sleeping like, 45 minutes at a time. And thus, I didn't get up on time, and I missed my shower, and almost made Daddy late.
This is not fair. I'm at home. I'm supposed to sleep like a normal person. I won't survive the summer on cat-naps... I barely survived the school year that way...
So what am I supposed to do?
Also, I would like to point out the fact that I have gained a little bit of weight. I realize this. I know my clothes are tighter than they were. I do not need everyone who sees me to point this out to me... I know exactly how much I weigh, and if I am unhappy with my weight, I will take the initiative to change it. Meanwhile, please keep your catty remarks to yourself. I don't think I look that bad, I'm certainly healthier than i was last semester when I was like, 10 pounds lighter... so get over it. Or don't tell me about it. Really. I'm fine. Thank you.
posted by Deedee 8:20 AM
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Monday, May 12, 2003
I'm at work. Yay!!
So I'm home from school, which is good, because I'm not stressing about grades and stuff, but is bad, because I'm at home with my family like, 24/7. *sigh*
Daddy did chemo last week... so I came home at the end of that. Which sucked, a lot. Thursday night, when i came home, he was hurting really bad... to the point that he was crying, and then I was crying.... I had to leave the house. But Chad got me somewhat calmed down... and Daddy's ok now... or at least not hurting. It's one of those things, though... Daddy has always made everything better... but there's nothing we can do to make Daddy feel better. It's not fair...
And we're (translation: "I'm") trying to get everything moved from the trailer into the house, all before June 1st. But no one is helping. And there's no way I can do it myself... so something's gonna hafta give.
And my family are all high strung at the moment, and easily set off... and yesterday was Mother's Day... and I changed drugs this week...
so all this adds up to explain my lack of emotional stability at the moment...
but it'll all be ok. Because I'm going to Starkville this weekend with Chad. And that will make it all better. *grin* And we're gonna go and pick up my car. And maybe go house shopping. And drag some of my boys out to see the Matrix Reloaded.
Meanwhile, I'll be at work. Which is so much better than being at home. Because no matter how little I get done at work, and how much work is left undone (and let me tell you, there is always work left undone)... everyone is thrilled with my progress. And no one stresses about the work that isn't done... it'll either get done eventually, or it won't... we'll deal either way. Whereas, at home, everything has to be done, and everything has to be done now, and I never get enough of it done, and no one is ever happy.... blah blah blah. So yeah. Work is good. Really good. *grin*
posted by Deedee 9:53 AM
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Thursday, May 01, 2003
food for thought....
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
~ Alduous Huxley
Neither do annoying people, unfortunatly... *sigh*
posted by Deedee 11:07 AM
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wow... "sweetie, sexy, empitome of the perfect woman"... I don;t hink anyone's ever called me that before. Hmmm... I shall definately have to post more often *grin*
Finals are upon us, so don't expect too much from me until after like, the 8th. but then, I'll be at work, connected to the in-tar-net for 8 or so hours a day... so you'll prolly hear more than you want too ;-)
As far as newsy stuff goes... we had a great time in Huntsville, albeit some last minute difficulties... did lots of thrifting, went to a book sale.... didn't make it to Panoply, though. Maybe next year...
p.s. Matt is my Boy Toy? Who'd have thought? *wink*
posted by Deedee 10:54 AM
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This is my brain..... in part, at least.
