You treat life like a picture / But its not a moment frozen in time So there’s been a lot going on in my head lately, most of which doesn’t translate well into language, much less blog-world. Just a lot of rambling stuff, I suppose, about growing up, friends, family, and life in general. And I’ll throw some religion and politics in there, just to spice it up a bit.
But yeah. Point is, I really haven’t had much to say. That anyone wants to read. Or for that matter, that I want to write. But, one of my brain ramblings has produced a series of thought that (I think) are actually post worthy, so here goes:
I always have these high plans for things… like this year, I started out with some goals (some realistic, some... well, will take some work, at best). And I go along pretty well for a while on the adrenaline of accomplishing things... I think, this is awesome! And then I miss a day (or whatever)… and I spend so much time beating myself up over the missed part, and feeling like I screwed everything up (I tell myself I’m good at that), that I miss the next one, and the one after... and after a while, I’m like, what’s the point? I've already "fallen off the wagon"... so I might as well not try (after all, I'll probably just mess up again).
And then I get to a point, again, where I’m faced with the consequences of not having done whatever (for example... having 8000 loads of laundry to do, because I put it off… who knew we owned so many clothes? Or having gained weight because I was too tired/lazy to cook, and we ate fast food several times during the week)... and I say to myself... Self, if you had done what you were supposed to, you wouldn’t be here. So I jump back on the wagon, and resolve to do better. Next time. Next week. Next year. Whatever.
I’m working through the FlyLady system... which I really like. But I’ve been doing the crash-and-burn cycle for like, 6 months. I keep reading: "You’re not behind, just jump in where you are", and I think... sure, I’ll jump in. As soon as I get caught up on the dishes. As soon as the laundry is done. As soon as the house is clean. As soon as I lose the 10 pounds I gained over the holidays. As soon as I find the perfect notebook to hold my control journal. As soon as I’m not behind…
The point is, I need to not get so hung up on the "wrongs", and learn to bounce back. Without falling off the wagon. I need to celebrate the "rights", and remember why I’m trying to make changes / do things better. And to see the big picture, not just the tiny corner that says this isn’t working.
So, following that idea, here are the things I’ve accomplished so far this year:
I have started eating healthier, most days of the week (this includes cooking healthier dinners, which has been kind of hit-and-miss, and packing lunch).
I have managed to work out for at least 15 minutes at least twice a week (go ten minute workout dvds!)
I cleaned out one drawer of the dresser and (finally) started using some of the drawer dividers I bought forever ago.
I got (with Chad’s help) almost half of the dvds scanned and into the new cataloging software I bought.
Chad and I cleaned out most of the garage in preparation to make it into a martial arts workout room (this was a huge task).
I’ve been drinking more water (not back up to 8 glasses a day consistently, but working on it).
I have entirely cut out caffeinated soda, and only drink soda at all if I’m out at a restaurant.
Still sorting out life but I'm doing alright It's 9pm, and I'm actually thinking about just going to bed. How freakin' lame is that?
It has been a crazy week, though... or couple of weeks... geez, a month? the summer? Suffice it to say, the craziness abounds.
Chad's schedule has been crazy, doing ISTs and other cool acronyms... which has given me a couple of evenings to chill, and have the house to myself. This is in theory pretty cool, but I have yet to figure out how to make it work. For instance, Monday night I reviewed a list of things that Manda suggested doing the last time she had the house to herself... and ended up doing none of the listed things, and instead watching City Confidential, followed by crappy reality TV (WifeSwap), followed by a really odd documentary type show about a family that has 13 kids and only spend $150 a week at the grocery store. I got some cleaning done in there, too, but mostly just watched crappy TV.
Tonight I watched City Confidential, and then got sucked into a documentary about a serial killer who eventually got caught and put on death row, but they never found half the people he killed... yeah. Really healthy TV habits. But I got some other cleaning stuff done, read the first couple of chapters of a book someone lent me, and now I'm ready to call it a night I guess...
In other news, starting September 1 I'll be a real full time employee at Landmark, doing usability and like, getting paid and stuff. And benefits. Like a real person. Isn't that amazing?
In other other news, apparently my brother tore his rotator cuff at work... so now instead of stocking produce, he's greeting people at the door. So if you happne through the Sparkman Drive Wal-mart between 4am and noon (no clue what days), you should wave at him and stuff.
And for the record, I'm not terribly fond of hurricanes. Phenomenal cosmic (destructive) power aside, the build up is annoying. And people freak out, and panic, thus causing other people to panic, and it's not fun. I like tornadoes better. They destroy smaller areas, they don't tend to come with floods, and you only have a few minutes to panic and freak out.
That being said, we have an evacuation plan, and I have now put my finger on everything we would need to take with us (a surprisingly small list, really, which makes me wonder... why do we have so much other stuff?).
Anyway. I'm falling asleep whilst typing, which is always bad. I'm going to quit fighting it, and go to bed, which is pretty sad, actually).
I wake up and tear drops they fall down like rain... Blah. Been having kinda a blah week, really. I think I'm coming down with something (when am I not?), I've been waaaay stressed out at school (having your ass handed to you on a platter by the departmental progress committee will do that), the realization that New Orleans is never going to fully recover has finally hit me, and it's just been kinda blah.
But this past weekend was awesome. I enjoyed New Orleans Mardis Gras to it's fullest (and by that, I mean the drunken part but not the orgy part. Contrary to popular opinion, I do have a few limits). I caught beads (lots of beads), ate decent New Orleans food (port of call was really busy, so no hamburgers for us), watched parades, walked down Bourbon Street, and drank a drink that was literally more than half as tall as I am. In case you wanted to know, I cannot in fact hold my liquor like He-Man, everything is funnier when you're drunk, my drunken vocabulary mostly consists of the words "totally" and "awesome", and fire is the most totally awesome thing ever to be in a parade. Oh yeah, and I'm never (ever) allowed to drink that much Hurricane again.
But yeah. Back to the humdrum (but not boring, no never boring) life of a grad student. I've finished tonight's homework, and now I'm trying to decide whether to read Eugene Field while taking a bath, or to play Elebits (the greatest Wii game evar).
Oh yeah... all my pictures are broken. I'm working on that, it's annoying, I hsould have it fixed sometime this week (moaybe tomorrow).
Broken Roads So I was going to post somehting mushy yesterday, in honor of it being valentine's day, but I forgot :/ Then when I rembered today, I realized that 1) it's not valentine's day any more, and 2) the song lyrics I was going to post that remond me of Chad... I already posted them. A while back. When the song came out, I think. So yeah, I'm not going to repost them here, but I think "Bless the Broken Road" by Rascall Flatts would have been appropriate yesterday.
Other than random forgetting of stuff (which is totally normal, for me, I suppose), I'm kind of just hanging in here. I think I might have pissed off my advisor, and I'm really really tired for nogood reason, and I fixing to have to sue my car insurance company because my health insurance company is going to stop paying for my back problems, since they were caused by my accident, and my car insurance company thinks they shouldn't have to pay all of it (or something). it all lovely.
But. It is all ok. Because, rain or shine (weather.com says shine!), I'll be in New Orleans for Mardis Gras weekend (which is to say, Saturday), and I get to see all (some) of my Mississippi people, and be totally crazy (within some amount of reason, I suppose). Yay for Mardis Gras! Yay for New Orleans! Yay for Port of Call hamburgers, and other good NOLA food! Yay for parades, and beads, and old friends! Yay for Harry Conick, Jr. (just because)!
Came across this song on Launchcast... it rang really true... more so than most gooey country love songs ;-)
I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
- "Bless the Broken Road" by Rascal Flatts
This is my brain..... in part, at least.
