just dance, gonna be okay / da-doo-du-dum I'm a-gonna have house guests, I'm a-gonna have house guests... and talk, and do fun things, and go to the beach! And maybe be a girl for a while.
Although the going to the beach thing might be interesting as I don't currently have a bathing suit that fits, and since I'm a mommy now it's generally frowned upon to go skinny-dipping in the ocean (at least in front of other people's kids). Although, come to think of it, it was probably frowned upon before i was a mommy, too. So we'll see what happens - I'll probably either end up wearing an ill-fitting one-piece swimsuit from high school (oh yes, I still have it), or an ill-fitting two-piece from before I had stretch marks and 25 pounds of baby fat. Either way, it should be fun.
And Brianna has a bathing suit, at least, so it should make for some cute pictures (as long as I stay out of them!).
I'm not a princess / This ain't a fairy tale This.
Seriously. I mope a lot sometimes ("a lot sometimes"... does that even make sense?) that I don't have time / space / energy to maintain the kind of fierce oh-it's-3am-and-you-need-to-talk?-No-problem! friendships that I had in college. I mean, sure, I have friends now. A few even live in the same town, imagine that. But between the job, the commute, the baby, and the husband (who has his own job and commute) - I feel sometimes like I don't see everyone. Or anyone. Or have time to actually have any kind of meaningful relationship. Even my bible study group (which I love!) has been a little more distant this year, in part due to the fact that we're meeting on Wednesdays and have limited time, and in part due to the fact that I missed like, 2 months or something while I was still getting my feet under me after Brianna was born. So sometimes I feel a little... detached.
So yeah. nice to know I'm not the only one. And to be reminded that (while people and outside relationships are important)... I can still be "attached" to Someone, even when I don't feel it. And maybe that detached feeling... is actually a sign that I should explore exactly where my comfort and security are coming from, and make sure my priorities are in line with what they should be.
Take some time, mellow out / Party up, but don't fall down Yay! Fun stuff is happening! and more is about to happen!
Went to a graduation party this weekend for Dr. Sarah Nagel. Who's dad is now the Faculty Senate President at State. So we spent a lot of time catching up on the real story of what's going on at State (not the nice, clean, daffodil-drama-free story that I get in the alumni newsletters). Fun times! And best of all, Sarah might not be moving far away from us (yet, at least)! While we were there, my mom called to tell me that...
My sister is coming to visit me this week! She's flying in Wednesday, and flying out on Sunday, which is the same day we leave for our...
Disney Vacation! Cruise and theme parks! As grown-ups! Yay! and a couple of days after we get back, we get to leave again because...
William is getting married! So we get to travel to The Coast and see old friends and stuff. I love visiting old friends, so we're doing it again in late June or early July when...
We meet Richie and Angela in Orlando to go to Universal for a couple of days. But, it gets better than that. They just got engaged, so...
We'll be traveling to Seattle for their Wedding in November!
So much travel! It's crazy! But yeah, it should be fun. Sometime in all of this, we might have to think about going home to visit our parents...
Maybe I push when I meant to be still / Maybe I take it all too personal In general, I over-analyze things. By "things" here, I mean everything: conversations, emails, body language, the importance of what is for dinner, etc. I have this sometimes crippling fear that someone, somewhere, will be mad at me for something. That they (whoever they are), in fact, might be mad at me right at this very moment. So I spend a great deal more time than I should trying to figure out who (if anyone) is mad at me, and what I did to cause this, and how I can make it better.
Amazingly often, I talk myself into believing that someone is mad at me (even when they aren't), and I get all stressed out about it, and (when I've exhausted my other options for trying to make this better without actually communicating the fact that I think they are mad at me) I resort to some more adult method of dealing with my problems: I avoid said people in person while saying vague, snarky, passive-aggressive things about them on my blog. Then, if (by chance) I find out that they were not, in fact, mad at me in the first place, I feel guilty.
Occasionally, though, I don't realize that people are mad at me until long after the fact, when whatever it was that made them mad in the first place is now so huge that it causes them to avoid me entirely. Then I feel guilty for having missed whatever secret sign that I was looking for in all my over-analyzing. All the while, telling everyone else that it doesn't really bother me.
The moral of the story? I should stop over-analyzing and get over myself :-) Generally, I don't get it right, and even if I do I can't really change anything. People who value relationships generally will let you know when you've seriously upset them (you know, before they can't stand being around you any more).
That being said, I really enjoyed church yesterday. It was the first time I'd really felt home there... I don't know how to describe it. It was nice to have people stop to talk to me and know my name. Joining a women's small group wasn't what I expected, but I'm glad I've stuck with it... it has certainly helped with feeling like I'm a part of something, and is encouraging me to reach out into other small groups.
My mission for the year: don't over-analyze interactions with people at church. They aren't all mad at me.
For what it's worth / It was worth all the while So we drove to Denver this past weekend, which was awesome (which is to say, being in Denver and visiting people was awesome, having a captive audience in the car for 36+ hours was awesome, the driving itself was not so awesome). I got to see all kinds of interesting things for the first time on the trip though:
Oklahoma, Kansas, and Colorado. Ha!
Giant windmill things (in Kansas)
Tumbleweed
Prairie dogs
Oil wells (the kind that look like those bird-looking perpetual motion things... not sure how to describe it)
The Rockies
I also learned some things on the trip:
Kansas is the birthplace of Annie Oakley, Buffalo Bill, and William Chrysler.
The first patented helicopter was in Kansas.
In spite of all this, Kansas is lame.
Apparently, real trees don't really grow where there's no water, so you get stuck with these little weedy trees... which are funny. But not really trees.
Those windmill things are bigger than I could have imagined.
Traveling to Denver while trying to get over a sinus infection will make your ears hurt. But they won't actually explode. Which is good.
We got to visit Krys, Manda, and their boys, play Shanghai (though not the last couple of rounds), eat pancakes and sushi (not at the same time), tour Boulder, appreciate the awesomeness of friends who have known you forever and don't manufacture their own drama, run around Pearl St. mall, and Manda introduced me to a store that sells happy-hippie eco-friendly natural soaps and shampoos and stuff. And they are opening one in Houston. Yay! I might have to buy stock in them or something, seriously.
All in all, the trip was a success. I would definitely do it again, with less car this time, and more airplane.
Thoughts... I probably think too much. Check that... I definately think too much. And generally not about whatever I should be paying attention to.
All of my female friendships seem to have a 6 month expiration date. Which probably says more about me than I'd really care to deal with.
I got called a tramp at kroger today. By someone I don't even know. No idea what the deal was.
I have a midterm on Wednesday, and I need to do well. I've started studying, but it's one of those tasks that seems like I'll never finish. No idea how the rest of the class is doing... I wasn't invited to any study sessions, so I'm assuming there aren't any.
I'm still working on getting the stupid voices for my first year project... no idea when that'll come through. I'm just short one male voice at the moment.
Spring break is coming up. And I need it really bad this year... I don't know... I'm like a fish out of water or something. I just don't seem to fit in my skin anymore, and its showing in my attitudes towards school, too.
Anyway. Enough randomness. Must get back to the studying.
I had to learn the hard way... Um. So yeah, Bob the Builder. But now, make that a midget pr0n version of Bob the Builder. (Someone warned me that this existed, and I didn't believe them. I had to see it for myself, which was probably dumb, and has probably scarred Chad for life).
Anyway. Had a great night tonight. Ate dinner (ribs and chicken) with David and Nichole, went to see Night at the Museum, almost ate donuts, and now I'm killing itme on the internet, proving to myself that mankind truely has descended to a point where people find a reason to post pictures of midgets wearing bob the builder hats and posing in um, very interesting positions. I'm just saying, I didn't think we'd fallen quite that far yet... but I was wrong. The intarweb is a strange and scary place. And on that note (and before I see anything else scary or wrong), I'm going to bed.
It's funny what you know and still go on pretending With no good evidence you'll ever see that happy ending
Newsish type stuff. It is good to have friends who, you know, live in the same town as you. Just in case you wondered.
So yeah. Life is... life, I guess. Plodding along through school... got an awesome project for my First year project... now I just have to survive my classes. I honestly don't know how people work and go to school at the same time... it's killing me.
But weekends have been awesome lately, since we've been hanging out with people who 1) have the same interests as we do, 2) like to watch movies and play board games, and 3) are strangly very much like me and Chad.
It's kind of odd though... I'm trying to think of the last time I had a friend who wasn't a guy that I could call up any time and hang out or whatever... and I'm thinking that it was pretty close to freshman or sophmore year... yeah, probably when Elisa and I were still close friends (before we, you know, roomed together for waaaay to long).
Anyway. Just a short deviation from the 6 point entry. Maybe I'll post a 6-pointer later today, just so you don't think I'm breaking stride or somehting. :-)
update... overdue, I suppose. So yeah. I haven't updated. Because really, nothing is going on here. I could blog everyday, but it would be like, "Today is Monday. I went grocery shopping and took the trash out. That is all."
This weekend was a break from routine though. Krys and Manda came to visit, with childrne and cats. The children were well-behaved, and the cats... were not as poorly behaved as they could have been. But we had a good time, and it was nice to do some different things (and to have an excuse to go see the children's museum).
Other than that, the most interesting thing I've done has been get totally addicted to D&D online. This is exactly why I never played WoW or anything like that. So now we're playing like, 3 times a week. So sad. Yet fun. Maybe I can get my brother addicted.... hmm.
Weekend Happenings So lots of stuff happened this weekend, which is interesting because nothing really happened this weekend...
We went to Memphis. And Chelsea turned 18. And we went out to eat... at which time Chad panicked his mother for like, 30 seconds, which was funny. We hung out with Brian, and watched Sky High (good), and ate out, and returned an iPod in hopes of getting a nano, only to discover that there are no Nanos anywhere in the south. And we played poker (and I won), and no one did any homework, really... And we visited with Krys and Manda, and ofught with the credit union, and brought home a cat who was living under Chad's mustang.
The cat has no name, yet. But we're working on that.
In other happy news, I wrote a lab for the class I'm teaching, and my instructor liked it a lot and -mail it to Dr. Reese, who used to teach the class before she was promoted to dean of education (or something like that), and she really liked it. And told me so. Yay.
And in sad news, we returned the Bose system, because it wouldn't play Indiana Jones. And wouldn't work with our current av devices, such as the playstation, or the media center. And htere was a part to mek it work, but it cost another $200, and if we installed it the system would no longer work with the TV. So we might get speakers, eventually, or something, but no Bose for us right now.
Tupelo here we come! I think we're going to tupelo for dinner tonight. At the very least, we're going out for steak.
Richard has happy news, news that apparently made him dance around the room when he found out (and I don't blame him)... he has a job offer, doing something he likes to do, working for a big well-known company. (as no one who reads this knows Richard, besides me and Chad, I don't think I'm really stealing his thunder here).
The only problem... it's in Seattle. No so much of a problem for Richard, but you know, kinda sad for us (although the logicy side of me admits that we are moving to Houston in January anyway...). At least now I guess we have an excuse for traveling to Washington (I've never been there).
Anyway. A yummy steak dinner will be enjoyed by all tonight. Yay!
I'm sorry. I forgot that friends are only supposed to say nice things that don't piss you off or hurt your feelings. Stupid me, I thought that pat of being a friend might possibly be voicing concerns and worries, and I don't know, possibly trying to figure out why you make the decisions that you do.
But then, I regularly ditch my friends to do homework. What do I know.
Long weekend. Got stuff done. But now I'm tired. *sigh*
The wedding was nice... nice drive up there, nice to see friends again, nice to see Sam and Loraine married... nice to be back home :-)
So for the next couple of days, I'm gonna sit back and relax... and play with my cool B-5 action figures (a graduation present from David and Nicole) :-)
Yeah. Might post more later. Need to go to bed now. *sigh* I need sleep. Sleep is evading me again...
Somehow, the fact that this is the last set of undergrad finals I'm ever going to have to take isn't so encouraging...
Pray for Nick (or light a candle, or keep him in your thoughts, or send him positive energy, or whatever it is that you people do)... there's never a good time for a sudden death in the family... but two days before finals start has to be one of the worst.
For those of you using IE, you may have been experianceing technical difficulties with my site... namely, it wouldn't load... if you still can't get to it (how will you read this?), I think the problem lies in your cookie settings... try accepting more cookies... or something like that.
Anyway... now that that frustration has been dealt with...
Life is still good. It rained all day yesterday, a cold dark rain... it was awesome. I went puddle jumping... which was even awesomer. And I cooked some of the best lamb chops ever... I love lamb. But it's so expensive.... I prolly won't be able to buy any more until Passover, at least. I suppose I should be happy they even sell it in Starkvegas... that's an imporvement over last year.
Tonight I'm cooking again, stroganoff, it looks like. For Me and William and whoever else shows up... Matt, Sbbn, Greg... dunno who's going to be able to make it. but it'll be good. :-)
Meanwhile, I need to shower and clean my room and stuff so I can have company over tonight. I may post later.... we'll see.
This is my brain..... in part, at least.
